If you think TSF could be a footballer that hasn’t yet been mentioned in the Leading Candidates or Candidates Ruled Out sections then add them in the comment box below with your argument for their case. (Try a search for your player first using the search bar in the top right. If they don’t already […]
If you think TSF could be a footballer that hasn’t yet been mentioned in the Leading Candidates or Candidates Ruled Out sections then add them in the comment box below with your argument for their case.
(Try a search for your player first using the search bar in the top right. If they don’t already have a page on this site then go ahead and add them below.)
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286 responses to “Someone Else?”
Leighton Baines
William Gallas.
Game over. It’s James Beattie.
Older player.
Currently playing in the Premier League.
Striker.
Married.
English.
Played under at least 4 managers.
Has a friend who plays for liverpool? Beattie spent 3 years on Merseyside.
Played for one manager for a long time who was seen as a great before ‘losing it’. Maybe Gordon Strachan at Southampton?
Has had a transfer between 2 Premier League clubs.
Played with a group of French players: Southampton 2004-2005 had 3 French players, plus a Moroccan, a Senegalese and a Togolese, all of whom would have spoken French as their first language.
“…played for great managers, and I’ve also played for one or two where I would happily have faked my own death if it meant not working with them a minute longer…” – This could be his infamous bust up with Tony Pulis at Stoke.
Strong father figure. “But I don’t have to prove anything to anyone, apart from my dad. He still scares me a little bit!” _http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/columnists/henrywinter/2322204/Bryan-Robsons-faith-helps-James-Beattie.html_
Also, Beattie is intelligent and, I believe, had an expensive private education, and so assuming the TSF isn’t ghost written, he’s the kind of guy who’s likely to be able to string a sentence together.
Phil Neville
Was thinking through other possibilities;
Emile Heskey:
Played under a multitude of managers, and has made many moves between premier league teams. His father Tyrone seemed a strong father figure. Problems with confidence. Played at a Liverpool team with many French and French speaking players. Only engaged and never married though.
Lee Bowyer.
Again played under many managers, moved between Premier league clubs. Has had spats with managers, but doesn’t quite seem the right character for the blog, although could have changed since earlier years.
Alan Smith.
Played under a few managers, transferred between two Premier league teams. Unsure of anything personal life wise.
Matthew Upson.
Played under a few managers, transferred between Premier League teams. Played in teams with high amount of French/French speaking players. Scandinavian friend (Ljungberg? Also friend that played in USA?). Not married though.
Stephen Warnock.
Played under a few managers, transferred between Premier League teams. Played in a Liverpool team with high number of French speakers. Giant of the game manager ‘losing it’ O’Neill? Houllier? Scandinavian friend, many in that Liverpool squad. No idea about personal life.
David Dunn.
Fits little of the criteria.
Shaun Wright-Phillips.
Played under many managers, transferred between Premier League teams. ‘Strong’ father figure. Unlikely to have been in the terraces with, and is a pundit though…
Attended a good school, played in a Chelsea team with a few French/French speakers. Suffered from occasional loss of confidence. Played under some managers that could be perceived as wanting to be players. And under Keegan ‘losing it’ as well as Scolari playing them in tactics that made them look bad.
Don’t know about personal life.
Gareth Barry.
Played under a few managers, transferred between Premier League teams. Not confident of there being massive numbers of French/French speakers at Villa. Had long term Girlfriend, who he is now married to. Best friend is an agent, could be reason behind agents blog.
Jonathan Woodgate.
Played under many managers, transferred between Premier League teams. French and French speakers at most. Played under ‘great’ and ‘poor’ managers. Likely to have had confidence problems whilst at Madrid. Don’t know any personal life details.
A recent tweet: “The sun caught me out today. Very sore arms and neck!” makes it most likely (but not certain) to be a white guy with short/no hair.
thats some great detective work!! danny murphy looking more and more likely
robbie keane ????
Jason Roberts – Not ‘English’ but would definitely refer to them as us. 30’s, transferred between premiership clubs, large french contingent at current premiership club blackburn (although very few english players to shout ;)) – Comes off as well spoken and intelligent in a way in keeping with the tone of the articles
Married?
Liverpool friend?
Didn’t TSF say ‘One of the English lads shouted..’, wouldn’t this suggest he is not English..?
Not really clear – but possible certainly
He referred to the England team as ‘us’: http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/blog/2011/mar/26/the-secret-footballer-fabio-capello -penultimate paragraph
I think we’re forgetting a little lad from Chester. Scored an amazing goal against Argentina that time.
See the Candidates Rules Out section
Gareth Barry
Married Childhood sweetheart…best friend is his agent…
Has played with French speaking players at Man City, Toures, Adebayor, Kompany…
Very Versatile player, has played most positions…
Played with Adebayor who doesnt like to move to much, but still speaks highly of the player, saying along the lines of “wants the better of the players, not because hes lazy etc.” So must be a good striker.
O’leary lost dress room at Villa didnt he?
Respects Redknapp because hes probably the best english manager out there, but who doesnt respect ‘the messiah’?
Never appeared as a pundit i dont think?
One interesting thing i noticed which i expected TSF to pick up on was Bartons rant about english players…however he didnt, maybe because he was upset by Barton calling Barry crap… Surely otherwise he would have mentioned it in some form??
Check his twitter posts too- there were a bunch the other day making suggestions for greatest song of all time, few in there you might not expect from typical footballer- Radiohead, Beatles, Gimme Shelter. I remember an interview with Kevin Davies where he says he likes Ronan Keating, big on the pop music, think that rules him out.
https://www.whoisthesecretfootballer.co.uk/index.php/clues-from-his-tweets/
Owen – at Liverpool with French players, with Newcastle when they went down. But on the other hand he has an official twitter account and posts using Twitter for iPad but the secret footballers twitter is done by hootsuite.
https://www.whoisthesecretfootballer.co.uk/index.php/michael-owen/
when voting for pfa player of the year you are not allowed to vote for someone from the same club as your own. Tsf voted for tevez and wilshire, ruling out any arsenal or man city player.
Its steve sidwell. Basically, of all the players ive ever seen or heard interviewed in a vaguely contemporary context, hes the only one who strikes me as anywhere near being able to comment in an as insightful way as the author of the column, even if filtered via a ghost.Plus hes a ginna, which if i receollect correctly, ticks a box or two…
A freedom of info request to the guardian should do the trick (theyre big on that, what with wikileaks and all) or else the inland revenue
ok, no doubt… it’s Sol Campbell. Currently at newcastle, played for a load of managers, different clubs and of course loads of frenchies.
Come On guys.
x
Cheers kev, added to checklist and subsequently ruled out Barry and Wright-Phillips
The case for Jermain Jenas
1. Is he English? yes
2. Is he currently married? Has been and is or soon will be?
3. Has he played under at least 4 managers? Yes – hart, robson, souness, ramos, jol, redknapp.
4. Has he had a transfer between 2 Premiership clubs? Newcastle -> Spurs
5. Is he a current Premier League player? yes
6. Has he played with a group of French players at one club? Robert, Bernard, + LuaLua – French speaker?
7. Has he played with “a striker who refused to move unless the pass went exactly where he wanted it”? Berbatov @ spurs?
8. Did he play for one manager for a considerable amount of time who was great before ‘losing it’? Sir Bobby? Jol?
9. Has he played for a manager who ‘lost the dressing room’? ditto
10. Does he have a friend who plays for Liverpool? Don’t know, Joe Cole maybe?
11. Might he think Harry Redknapp is the Messiah? Plays for him…
12. Has he appeared as a pundit? (TSF probably doesn’t do so) No idea..
13. Did he have a long term girlfriend as a younger player? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jermaine_Jenas#Personal_life
14. Had/has a strong father figure. “
15. Has a daughter. Yes
+ doesn’t play for City or Aresenal and explains why didn’t consider Bale?
Another criteria,
http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/blog/2011/apr/09/secret-footballer-respect-referees
“My wife told me that last week two girls no older than 13 or 14 were shouting the F-word at anybody who came near them…. Apparently I came in for a particularly vicious barrage after miscontrolling a pass”
TSF has played a match the weekend 2nd – 3rd April, so this rules out lots of the injured or out of favour candidates, including Joe Cole, Woodgate, Gerrard, Andy Johnson, Heskey…
Good work. Although it’s more likely that he is referring to having played the weekend before that (26-27 March). -He would most likely have written the article in the week building up to the 9 April edition of the Guardian and therefore be referring to ‘last week’ as the week after the round of matches 26-27 March. I’d say long term absentees can pretty much be ruled out on these grounds.
Ok i read the coloumn for the first time on sataurday and my first thought was Rio Ferdinand. He has a daughter, he has two team mates who have had affairs at manchester united, he loves twitter, he’s an older player who’s experienced.
what do people think?
Rio had an affair himself, unlike TSF (allegedly).
How about Dion Dublin? Sounded relatively bright on Goals On Sunday last sunday.
Stuart Taylor – Man City
Played recently for Man City in Premier League
Played at Arsenal when all the French players were there
Played for Villa when Martin Oneil started to lose the plot.
Goalkeepers suffer from confidence
English
Played under 4 managers, and sold between Premier League clubs.
Lives in North West – likely to have a friend at Liverpool..
Not sure if married or has a daughter – but good chance he might.. can anyone confirm??/
Joey Barton
1. Is he English? Yes
2. Is he currently married? Yes
3. Has he played under at least 4 managers? Yes
4. Has he had a transfer between 2 Premiership clubs? Yes city-Newcastle
5. Is he a current Premier League player? yes
6. Has he played with a group of French players at one club? yes
7. Has he played with a striker who refused to move unless the pass went exactly where he wanted it? loads at City
8. Did he play for one manager for a considerable amount of time who was great before losing it? keegan
9. Has he played for a manager who lost the dressing room? keegan
10. Does he have a friend who plays for Liverpool? Gerrard
11. Might he think Harry Redknapp is the Messiah? unknown
12. Has he appeared as a pundit? (TSF probably doesn’t do so) no
13. Did he have a long term girlfriend as a younger player? yes
14. Had/has a strong father figure. unknown
15. Has a daughter. yes
16. Not an Arsenal or Man City player. correct
17. Did he play a match at some point towards the end of March/beginning of April 2011? yes
Very good point but he could just be saying “us” like in a supporter way like a fan refering to thier team
Indeed, so he’s English. Not necessarily played for England but is English.
Is there online evidence you can link that says he’s married?
Scott Parker?
1. Is he English? Yes
2. Is he currently married? Yes
3. Has he played under at least 4 managers? Yes
4. Has he had a transfer between 2 Premiership clubs? Yes
5. Is he a current Premier League player? Yes
6. Has he played with a group of French players at one club? Yes, Chelsea
7. Has he played with a striker who refused to move unless the pass went exactly where he wanted it? Yes, Di Canio at Charlton
8. Did he play for one manager for a considerable amount of time who was great before losing it? Curbishley (twice) or Zola?
9. Has he played for a manager who lost the dressing room? Curbishley or Zola?
10. Does he have a friend who plays for Liverpool? Joe Cole, they were at Chelsea together
11. Might he think Harry Redknapp is the Messiah? Possibly, he’s from Lambeth originally so he might have links with either Spurs or West Ham under Harry?
12. Has he appeared as a pundit? (TSF probably doesn’t do so) Not that I can think of
13. Did he have a long term girlfriend as a younger player? Don’t know
14. Had/has a strong father figure. Don’t know.
15. Not an Arsenal or Man City player. Yes
16. Did he play a match at some point towards the end of March/beginning of April 2011? Yes, I think so
While it’s looking more and more likely to be Danny Murphy, I wouldn’t rule out Michael Owenjust on the transfer thing, and would’ve him back to your “possibles” list. The transfer saga he’s describing could easily have been Everton trying to poach him from Man Utd as he neared the end of his Newcastle contract.
Marlon Harewood. The giveaway is the orange shirt with a vague number 9 (question mark) on it as TSF logo. The answer to any good mystery is always staring you in the face all along.
Harewood is Blackpools number 9. He has played for 4 Premier League clubs, and is a striker.
Going on the Tenyson quotes It could be Reo-Coker?
“Paolo” could be Paolo Wanchope, rather than Di Canio.
No mentions for Michael Carrick?
Played with Di Canio under Redknapp at West Ham.
Is English and has been in and around the international team.
Played for a number of managers during his career, and has been transferred between Permiership clubs.
Played under a manager (Roeder) who lost the changing room.
Any criteria he fails on?
Wanchope is spelt Paulo
https://www.whoisthesecretfootballer.co.uk/index.php/michael-carrick
Having discarded Southgate & Le Saux for reason various my vote goes to Rob Lee who was signed by Roeder who lost the dressing room. Roeder also fell out with Paolo Di Canio as well
Also ties in with a previous article of a manager fining him two weeks wages whilst injured. He went to a Pub but then at Newcastle the Manager Gullit ( EX Player ) smiled and asked him if he took home an escort. Has a Daughter , Outfield Player Mid & Defence,
Too young
Too French
But he voted for Carlos Tevez for PFA Player of the Year – and he hasn’t played a game for ages. I think that rules him out.
Forgive me if ive got the wrong end of the stick, but after trying to go onto the picture posted on twitter, my iPod sent me to google maps and straight to a street, can’t quite remember the name but it was something like Grey’s Park, Wrexham. I don’t know if this is a mere technical error, or if my iPod is loaded with some form of tracking device, but I thought this might be of note. The only person I can think of linked to Wrexham is Robbie Savage, but being a Derby fan, I think I can rule him out. This makes me think it is a player based on the England/Wales border, Craig Bellamy anyone? I’m really sorry if my iPod has just messed up and gone wrong, or if ive completely got the whole tweet thing wrong.
Oh I apologise, it was ‘Wexham’. Easy mistake. Either way, his location may have been revealed, I’m probably wrong though.
Oh, it’s western London, gotta be Murphy.
Nigel Reo-Coker?
But he also said he grew up on a council estate.
Steve Harper? He’s the only footballer I know in the Premiership who has a degree…
http://www.goal.com/en-gb/news/2896/premier-league/2010/08/22/2082443/newcastle-uniteds-joey-barton-ends-moustache-reign-after
Here he says “it was either my moustache or my relationship” not “moustache or my marriage” which would be more likely if he was married.
I thought sidwell. Extra evidence is sunburn on a warm spring day’s training!
BTW freedon of info only in public sector. Private sector can do what they like, e.g. bankers, press, property developers,football clubs!
He’s not married. He gets married next month
Parker did have a strong father figure, interview in the Daily Mail today
Peter Crouch.
Played under the ‘great’ Rafa Benitez who then promptly lost it and saw Scousers drop into freefall. That’d also explain mates in Liverpool.
The “us” for England – he’s an England International.
He’s also a traveller having gone Spurs->QPR->Pompey->Villa->Southampton->Liverpool->Pompey->Spurs
He was initially backup at Southampton after not really establishing himself at any one team. Then Redknapp arrived and sold off a couple of his rivals and focused the attack through him. Southampton got relegated and so Redknapp took a job where he could – Pompey & Crouch went to Liverpool under Rafa Benitez. Then when things went wrong at Liverpool he moved to Pompey & Harry gave him the no.9 shirt. Next thing you know he’s at White Hart Lane with Harry.
So he fits the multiple managers box, the Redknapp-lover box, the hero-to-zero-manager box, the Scouser box, married, older player, etc. etc.
He’s even got short hair and fair(ish) skin for the sunburn!
I was going to add Reo-Coker at one point then realised there was some evidence against him so didn’t. I can’t remember what it was now. I’ll look at him again and add him (even if only to be ruled out) later in the week.
https://www.whoisthesecretfootballer.co.uk/index.php/can-we-rule-out-all-goalkeepers/
https://www.whoisthesecretfootballer.co.uk/index.php/peter-crouch/
https://www.whoisthesecretfootballer.co.uk/index.php/steve-sidwell/
Have you got a link to the article?
Every time I read the article I can’t help but think that Jonothan Woodgate fits. Especially when he made mention of requiring hip and knee operations once he retires. He’s also had a wealth of experience with agents in the transfer market, and has worked under a long list of well known managers across england and even in spain. Given the amount of time he’s spent out injured, it’s something to occupy his time.
One possibly erroneous conclusion under “what we know” is that he played with Paulo Di Canio (April 30 column on easy divers). Could equally have been Paulo Wanchope.
Apart from the fact that he said ‘Paolo’ and not ‘Paulo’.
I accept that I may be wrong in this but, after 17 years in journalism, my gut feeling is that the Secret Footballer is actually an established writer with at least one friendly Premiership footballer feeding him (otherwise unpublishable) insights and tales of intrigue, vice and controversy to process into a more palatable form.
There’s just something about the copy that doesn’t quite ring true. I see eloquence followed by lines with a raw quality that (to my eyes) are redolent of a writer dumbing down, or at least preserving the spirit and tone of a conversation transcribed in thought or shorthand notes alone.
There may well be one individual, at a current PL club, who contributes the vast majority of tales. He might consider himself to be the Secret Footballer, and quietly rejoice as he reads his paraphrased lines every week.
I would suggest that every article is booby-trapped with at least one anecdote or name-check designed to lead readers to believe that it would be possible to, in time, learn this individual’s identity. Fat chance. There is an artful quality to the delivery of certain anecdotes; they feel authentic, yet sufficiently vague. This, to me, indicates a canny (and perhaps experienced) writer dropping in red herrings, not a veteran PL player risking his reputation for a Guardian gig.
But hey: that’s not to say that I wouldn’t be delighted to discover that it was actually Danny Murphy or Scott Parker. A British player exhibiting a degree of intelligence that might cause Robbie Fowler to cut himself in two with a shorts-based slur in his eagerness to establish their homosexual tendencies?* I’d have to restrain myself from dancing in celebration.
*This might be an obscure reference for younger readers. Google “le saux fowler”.
I don’t necessarily think that ‘Paolo’ is Di Canio. It could be ‘Paulo’ or more than likely, a common name used to cover up who it is.
Hamann was a master of winning free-kicks. But he couldn’t write Dietmar or Didi could he?
I reckon it’s Nedum Onuoha.
…then again, he isn’t married.
Damn.
Surely it is Frank Lampard ? looking at the checklist
1. Is he English? Yes
2. Is he currently married? No but in a long term relationship
3. Has he played under at least 4 managers? Yes
4. Has he had a transfer between 2 Premiership clubs? West ham and Chelsea
5. Is he a current Premier League player?Yes
6. Has he played with a group of French players at one club? Anelka Malouda etc.
7. Has he played with a striker who refused to move unless the pass went exactly where he wanted it? Drogba? Anelka? Hasselbank?
8. Did he play for one manager for a considerable amount of time who was great before losing it? Scolari
9. Has he played for a manager who lost the dressing room? Scolari
10. Does he have a friend who plays for Liverpool? Carragher Gerrard
11. Might he think Harry Redknapp is the Messiah? More than likely as he is his uncle
12. Has he appeared as a pundit? (TSF probably doesn’t do so) He has
13. Did he have a long term girlfriend as a younger player? Yes
14. Had/has a strong father figure. His father is very important to him
15. Not an Arsenal or Man City player. Yep
16. Did he play a match at some point towards the end of March/beginning of April 2011? Yes
17. Not a keeper. Nope
18. Has a daughter. Has 2
19. He played with Paolo Di Canio? I have a feeling that this could be Zola who was very good at winning free kicks and is Italian like the name Paolo which we must remember is probably changed
https://www.whoisthesecretfootballer.co.uk/index.php/frank-lampard/
I reckon James (above) might have some valid points – and possibly it could even be a composite of players!
– and try sorting that one out…
;o)
Michael Owen.
:)
Try searching for players first in case they’re already on here: https://www.whoisthesecretfootballer.co.uk/index.php/michael-owen/
David Bentley?
1. Is he English? Yes
2. Is he currently married? Yes – childhood sweetheart (13)
3. Has he played under at least 4 managers? Yes – Blackburn, Arsenal, Norwich (therefore associated with them re: tweet), Spurs, Birmingham
4. Has he had a transfer between 2 Premiership clubs? Yes
5. Is he a current Premier League player? Yes
6. Has he played with a group of French players at one club? Yes – Arsenal
7. Has he played with a striker who refused to move unless the pass went exactly where he wanted it? Pavlyuchenko?
8. Did he play for one manager for a considerable amount of time who was great before losing it?
9. Has he played for a manager who lost the dressing room?
10. Does he have a friend who plays for Liverpool?
11. Might he think Harry Redknapp is the Messiah?
12. Has he appeared as a pundit? (TSF probably doesn’t do so)
14. Had/has a strong father figure.
15. Not an Arsenal or Man City player.
16. Did he play a match at some point towards the end of March/beginning of April 2011? Yes (2nd April)
17. Not a keeper.
18. Has a daughter. http://twitter.com/#!/KimBowBentley – definitely a baby girl in that picture
19. He played with Paolo Di Canio.
20. Someone who’s got a chat about ‘another season’ coming up. At Brum?
21. He’s been involved in a last day relegation battle. 2004/5, and played. http://www.canaries.co.uk/page/MatchReport/0,,10355~27901,00.html
He’s also someone who’s previously admitted to betting issues, so would explain him being at Cheltenham.
I’m stuck for a friend at Liverpool, a manager who lost the dressing room (Norwich?) or a Paolo tho.
are you sure that the manager who was allegedly trying to get themselves sacked was roy the boy?
rafael honigstein and some other journalists are saying avram grant was barely managing west ham this year from very early on in the season.
“virtually no dead-ball training. fitness exercises lacking in intensity… No – NO – post-match debriefing apart from a DVD with key scenes for each player – without commentary!”
also, danny murphy seems pretty articulate and opinionated here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i_XmOt2yo7s
Could it be Jason Euell?
1. Is he English? – Yes, dual nationality with Jamaica
2. Is he currently married? – Yes
3. Has he played under at least 4 managers? – Yes
4. Has he had a transfer between 2 Premiership clubs? – Yes, Charlton and Middlesborough
5. Is he a current Premier League player? – Yes, with Blackpool (although on loan at Doncaster since Feb)
6. Has he played with a group of French players at one club? – Yes, he has played with some French players (a couple at Middlesbrough and at Southampton, none of whom seem to be major first team players and might have wanted to not integrate as they felt sidelined)
7. Has he played with a striker who refused to move unless the pass went exactly where he wanted it? – Yes, Paolo Di Canio at Charlton
8. Did he play for one manager for a considerable amount of time who was great before losing it? – Yes, he had long periods under both Curbishley and Joe Kinnear, both of whom were seen as very good at what they did before their careers started to tail off
9. Has he played for a manager who lost the dressing room? – Yes, Alan Pardew or Gareth Southgate
10. Does he have a friend who plays for Liverpool? – Yes, was in the same squad as Konchesky at Charlton
11. Might he think Harry Redknapp is the Messiah? – Yes, he might; Redknapp stuck up for him this season following the racism row after the Blackpool – Stoke league cup game
12. Has he appeared as a pundit? (TSF probably doesn’t do so) – No, I don’t think so
13. Did he have a long term girlfriend as a younger player? – Yes, I think so, according to the Times article in 2002 http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/premier-league/tragedy-spurs-euell-on-to-score-fifth-goal-664119.html
14. Had/has a strong father figure. – Possibly Joe Kinnear at Wimbledon: http://www.sport.co.uk/features/Football/1386/Sportcouk_meetsJason_Euell.aspx , http://www.skysports.com/socceram/story/0,21644,13873_4198679,00.html, http://www.highbeam.com/doc/1G1-110855869.html
15. Not an Arsenal or Man City player. – He’s been neither
16. Did he play a match at some point towards the end of March/beginning of April 2011? – Yes, Doncaster v Cardiff City 9 April 2011 and was on the bench for Doncaster for a couple of games around then as well
17. Not a keeper. – He’s not
18. Has a daughter. – He had a daughter who died just after being born in 2002, as referenced in http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/sport/119625/Now-Euell-see-Jason-go.html, but don’t know his circumstances now
19. He played with Paolo Di Canio – Yes, Charlton 2003
20. Someone who’s got a chat about ‘another season’ coming up – Yes, contract up at the end of this season with the option for another year
21. He’s been involved in a last day relegation battle – Yes, Wimbledon 2000 (lost 2-1 at Southampton and Bradford won 1-0 against Liverpool)
Emile Heskey
Search for the players using the search bar in the top right before posting on here: https://www.whoisthesecretfootballer.co.uk/index.php/emile-heskey/
Cracking shout, I’ll add him later tonight…
Not played with Di Canio. Doubt he thinks Harry is the messiah
He’s not played with Di Canio
Not played with Di Canio
Not sure about punditry, but he writes a column for the Evening Standard, “in association with” the agency that represents him.
just spent a couple of hours rereading the more recent articles and browsing here. after getting bogged down in trying to tick off the individual clues, the more i take an overview of the profile of a player who would want to write such a column in The Guardian the more i think it is Joey Barton. It could also be Danny Murphy (who i initially thought of, along with David James, who really does fit the profile although whose non-Prem status seems to rule him out), the mention of the best bits of the season montage being a strong clue. however, Barton doesn’t seem to contradict ANY of the clues you’ve outlined (it does appear he is married, although not sure about having a daughter). he was in a relagation with newcastle although was suspended, and also played with a paolo (incorrectly spelt) at man city. the suspicion it is likely to be a much lower profile player nearing the end of his career (such as James Beattie) is also hard to discount profile wise, but reading it the general tone really comes across as someone life joey, who is passionate about football and is keen to occupy himself with other pursuits which raise him above such culture. someone like Owen for instance just would never have the motivation to pen a column such as this.
Again, use the search function at the top, more often than not you’ll find the player is already on this site: https://www.whoisthesecretfootballer.co.uk/index.php/joey-barton/
yes i did read through that prior to posting
i guess what i’m trying to say is that we can’t go solely on the ‘facts’ given by TSF in his writing. They can be taken as a joke (such as the 16 Champion’s League tickets), with a pinch of salt (whether ‘Paolo’ is a generic name) or may even be willfully incorrect in order to protect his identity (someone writing anonymously may well throw in a few red herrings which do not contradict the substance of his columns in order to protect this). i’d also question whether this can be a sound method if it leaves Lee Bowyer ‘Still in the running’? I’m not saying the clues or ‘facts’ provided by TSF can be entirely discounted, but the bigger picture; thinking about why an experienced Premiership footballer would want to do this and take the risk, is also very important.
Kevin Phillips ticks the vast majority of boxes (taking Juan Pablo Angel as his ‘Paolo’) – don’t think he’s been mentioned.
Use the search bar at the top to find him … https://www.whoisthesecretfootballer.co.uk/index.php/kevin-phillips/
ok if you want to go down the solely ‘factual’ route why don’t you just find out who was the recipient of the described incident with howard webb? this one piece of ‘fact’ is surely unique enough to eclipse all other ‘clues’ and reveal TSF’s identity?
You first, go get hold of every single video of matches Howard Webb has reffed and watch them all in the hope that the incident was caught on camera ;)
Going to add my voice to the suggestion it’s Scott Parker.
1. Is he English? Yes
2. Is he currently married? http://www.zimbio.com/pictures/6HdM2ux4jzS/Jamie+Louise+Redknapp+Nightout+Nobu+Berkeley/HJ7Dqsf_OET/Scott+Parker%27s+Wife – suggests a relationship with the Redknapps too.
3. Has he played under at least 4 managers? Yes
4. Has he had a transfer between 2 Premiership clubs? Yes
5. Is he a current Premier League player? Yes
6. Has he played with a group of French players at one club? French players and French speakers at Chelsea.
7. Has he played with a striker who refused to move unless the pass went exactly where he wanted it? Possibly Chelsea players too. Di Canio at Charlton?
8. Did he play for one manager for a considerable amount of time who was great before losing it? Curbs twice.
9. Has he played for a manager who lost the dressing room? Curbishly again, and possibly Souness, who fits the bill for “manager who still wanted to be player” comment.
10. Does he have a friend who plays for Liverpool? Played with Joe Cole and Glen Johnson at Chelsea, would know some of them England duty, possibly Konchesky too
11. Might he think Harry Redknapp is the Messiah? Friendly with Jamie (see point 2), so possibly.
12. Has he appeared as a pundit? (TSF probably doesn’t do so) Don’t think so
13. Did he have a long term girlfriend as a younger player? Yes
14. Had/has a strong father figure. “The midfielder dedicated his goal against Liverpool last month to his father, to whom he was very close, and Mr Parker was at Upton Park to see his son score in West Ham’s 3-1 win.”
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-1368622/Scott-Parker-brave-face-West-Ham-Tottenham-hours-fathers-death.html#ixzz1NHyVIHdb
15. Not an Arsenal or Man City player. Check
16. Did he play a match at some point towards the end of March/beginning of April 2011? Yes
17. Not a keeper. Yes
18. Has a daughter. – Can’t find mention of it. Has sons though. Possible red herring??
19. He played with Paolo Di Canio – At Charlton.
20. Someone who’s got a chat about ‘another season’ coming up – Yes.
21. He’s been involved in a last day relegation – Was a Charlton player when they were relegated on the last day in 2000.
Just seen he’s actually been ruled out – only looked at the first page of the “Who it’s not” section.
What about Jonathan Greening at Fulham? He ticks a few boxes – several Prem clubs, including one or two involved in relegations fights. He looks as though he might like his music, too.
I don’t think Greening’s played with Paolo Di Canio, though personally I still think that clue is misleading. Apart from the fact that it could be a made-up name (or Paulo mispelt), it doesn’t necessarily refer to the player’s time in the Premiership. It could have been when he had a spell at a lower league club earlier in his career (as Greening did with York) or during his youth team days.
According to Wikipedia’s complete lists of players to have appeared in the Premier League and Football league, there have only been 3 Paolos (so this will rule out playing with a Paolo in the lower leagues):
Di Canio
Tramezanni (defender not renowned for diving, played just 6 games in EPL)
Vernazza (English)
Right, I’m joining the party late, there may well be some things i’ve missed, but i’ve checked out what i can and i’m going to go for…
Sol Campbell.
The only thing i can see going against him is the reference to ‘Paolo’. And it wouldn’t be impossible for TSF to throw this in as a red-herring whereby ‘Paolo’is just a stand-in name for the actual foreign player being spoken of.
The line in that article is playful anyway since it states ‘a foreign player’ as though he’s granting someone anonymity, and then he just names the guy. Fishy.
Campbell.
Sorry, I’m hogging this a bit, but it’s late, and this is a bit exciting.
The only other bit that rules Sol out is his not having a daughter, but TSF’s reference is future tense: “my daughter will be told to stay away from footballers”.
Going to bed now.
Yeah, cause we all know Jermain Jenas is cerebrally competent.
I’ll be honest, I haven’t put a lot of thought into it but just to confuse matters further I’ll throw a new name into the mix. Mark Schwarzer?
Steve Finnan struck me , not fully convinced this guy is stiil active. Played at every level too.
He’s Irish (see https://www.whoisthesecretfootballer.co.uk/index.php/what-we-know/ – March 26th article)
It’s not the same player every week
I really think that its Stephen Kelly, the Fulham full back. He’s a very intelligent speaker and seems capable of writing these kind of articles. He also appears to tick all the boxes… won promotion with Birmingham City. The manager he dislikes is Tony Pulis at Stoke I’d say when he was on loan there and barely got a kick. Regular with Martin Jol who lost the dressing room. Has played with French players. Lazy striker is either Berbatov or Bendtner. I believe that he has a daughter also.
Why do people think that TSF is English?
Beattie wasn’t privately educated, he went to Central Lancaster High School.
He didn’t live on a council estate.
Also TSF articles don’t seem very well written, so I don’t think, if he was privately educated it would be all that relevant
Could it not be a different player each week or a number of players contributing throughout the series?
Marcus Hahneman?
TSF is English because he referred to the England team as ‘us’
It could be, but it’s not.
Michael Carrick for me after reading the above and everything else… although there was a reference alluding other players being English, which might suggest the SF is not English….
TSF is English. Carrick is out – https://www.whoisthesecretfootballer.co.uk/index.php/michael-carrick
TSF, in one of his tweets, said people should sign the Hillsborough e-petition, so we can reasonably assume he has signed. So which footballers have signed the petition? The Guardian reported Michael Owen and Joey Barton have, any other names?
Yes he was, he was a couple of years above me at QEGS in Blackburn… can’t comment on the council estate part; I doubt he would have done knowing the school but he could be being hyperbolic.
It is Nigel Reo Coker. He once claimed the art of war as his favourite book. I bet he fits everything else too
It’s Nigel Reo-Coker. His favourite book is ‘The Art of War’. Close your poll.
Kevin Nolan?
https://www.whoisthesecretfootballer.co.uk/index.php/kevin-nolan/
He’s never been subject to a deadline day transfer
Among other things, he’s never been subject to a deadline day transfer
From the few I’ve read, what chance for Nigel Reo-Coker?
In the latest article, he references “The Art of War” which seems to tally with an old article about him on Guardian:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2006/apr/22/sport.comment1
Among other things, he’s never been subject to a deadline day transfer
Carlo Nash – possibly not a name many will be familiar with but formerly with Manchester City, Middlesbrough, Preston, Wigan, Everton and currently at Stoke.
He plays in goal & I’ve thought it might be a goalkeeper since he talked about his “opposite number” and the most recent article about English keepers seems to confirm that. He talks about Manchester City quite a bit so I presumed he had contacts there.
At Manchester City he was relegated and then promoted plus was also on loan at Stoke when they were promoted so those boxes ticked. He played the longest under Keegan, a manager who was “great but lost it” and I know there were tensions between the French speakers there (about 7 or 8 of them) and the English players (Barton & Pearce included). Anelka & Wanchope were part of that squad, both considered “lazy” and Wanchope could fall over his own feet. Paul Dickov was a forward who was in that squad & skilled at winning free kicks. The Paolo spelling instead of Paulo or Paul could easily be a red herring.
The story about having a friend at Liverpool is supposition but he did play at Everton, as back up to Tim Howard. That’s a club with problems & there is lots of speculation among their fans that Moyes is trying to engineer an exit, as he’s heartily sick of the situation there (no ambition or plan) but won’t resign.
Nash had a long-term girlfriend who is now his wife and they have a daughter so that’s another three boxes ticked. His 12 month contract at Stoke is coming up for renewal as well plus they started training early as they were in the Europa League and played their first tie in July.
The chaplain bit is revealing as Nash is a committed Christian and Manchester City were one of the first clubs to have a chaplain, the Rev Tony Porter. Porter, when lokingly asked what good he’d done for the team, memorably replied “Well if I wasn’t praying for them, just think where they might be.”
So quite a few clues there I think but another key fact is that Nash (with his wife) writes and publishes travel guides so he is quite capable of putting pen to paper.
Forgot to add McClaren was manager at Boro when Nash was there so he could tick the managerial box as well.
If it is a player at Fulham (from the pre-season training reference) could it not be one of the following? Damien Duff, Steve Sidwell, or Bobby Zamora.
All of which have experienced a relegation battle from the Premiership (Duff twice, Sidwell once, and Zamora surviving one) and tick quite a lot of the other clues.
I personally am more inclined to Duff or Zamora if they are at Fulham.
Thoughts?
‘Predictions for #England vs #Wales ? I’m going for 3-0. I’d say 4-0 but I think there could be an eye on the weekend games if England get 3’
This tweet implies he was not in the most recent England squad, Capello doesn’t allow twitter etc and I doubt he’d be predicting the outcome if he was on the bench or in the squad at all…
Duff is Irish
Regarding your Reo-Coker reply, the article suggests there was a deadline day bid, it doesn’t suggest that he was transferred on deadline day. I thought the inference was that he turned it down. Any thoughts?
Nicky Shorey? – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nicky_Shorey
1. Is he English?
Yes – 2 caps for national team.
2. Is he currently married?
Yes – http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/football/article-457909/Shorey-tie-knot-just-hours-taste-England-duty.html
3. Has he played under at least 4 managers?
At least – Steve Coppell at Reading, Martin O’Neill at Aston Villa, Roy Hodgson, Roberto Di Matteo, Hodgson again, on top of a couple more clubs
4. Has he had a transfer between 2 Premiership clubs?
First he was transferred from Reading to Aston Villa in 2008 but Reading has just been relegated. However, he did move from Villa to West Brom last year
5. Was he a Premier League player in January 2011?
Yes – came in in 33rd minute in West Brom’s 3-0 defeat at Fulham – http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/eng_prem/9331204.stm
6. Has he played with a group of French players at one club?
French players in his loan at Fulham?
Also thinking maybe at Aston Villa there were players like Habib Beye and Moussa Salifou (sp?) who would have spoken French despite not being actually French (n.b. Beye is described as ‘French-born’). They weren’t exactly playing too much, so it could be that TSF was referring to these guys in imprecise terms as ‘French’ because of the language they spoke as opposed to their identities.
7. Has he played with a striker who refused to move unless the pass went exactly where he wanted it?
Someone had suggested Nevland at Fulham before – see Paul Konchesky page comments
[https://www.whoisthesecretfootballer.co.uk/index.php/paul-konchesky/]
8. Did he play for one manager for a considerable amount of time who was great before losing it?
Steve Coppell at Reading looked for a long time like perhaps even a SAF replacement at Reading before it all fell apart with a collapse at the business end of the 2007-8 season. Also maybe Robert Di Matteo at West Brom last season?
9. Has he played for a manager who lost the dressing room?
Roberto Di Matteo at West Brom last season?
He was sacked for failing to turn things around after a mid season slump…
10. Does he have a friend who plays for Liverpool?
Don’t know
11. Might he think Harry Redknapp is the Messiah?
Don’t know
12. Has he appeared as a pundit? (TSF probably doesn’t do so)
Don’t think so
13. Did he have a long term girlfriend as a younger player?
Well he’s married now…
14. Had/has a strong father figure.
Steve Shorey is a scout at Reading – quote from Daily Express:
‘[Nicky’s] father Steve, who offered a young Nicky his first taste of football when the Baggies man was a youngster, remains his son’s closest mentor’
http://www.expressandstar.com/sport/west-bromwich-albion-fc/2010/10/14/its-a-family-affair-for-nicky-shorey/#ixzz1XZNlMXb7
15. Not an Arsenal or Man City player.
Check.
16. Did he play a match at some point towards the end of March or first few days of April 2011?
Yes, played in West Brom’s 2-1 victory over Liverpool on 2nd April 2011 – http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/eng_prem/9439626.stm
17. Not a keeper
Check.
18. Has a daughter.
Don’t know
19. He played with Paolo Di Canio
Hmm – have a problem here. Someone said it was a little too conspicuous (above),
20. Someone who’s got a chat about ‘another season’ coming up -see revealing tweet post
N/A
21. He’s been involved in a last day relegation battle
Reading, final day of 2007-8 season.
22. He’s played for a newly promoted Premier League club
Reading
23. Has been subject to a deadline day transfer
The 31st Jan loan move to Fulham, maybe?
It was the ‘last day in the transfer window’.
I know says ‘the selling club’ in the article, and this was a loan. But the BBC story specifies it was a ‘loan-to-buy’ deal that never actually became permanent in the end as Hodgson departed. Nevertheless, the wrangling over such a deal may still be the background to TSF’s deadline day story.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/football/teams/f/fulham/8487968.stm
24. Council estate?
Grew up in Chadwell Heath…
25. Friend who used to play in Russia
Andre Bikey at Reading.
It ISN’T Leighton Baines. Categorically and empirically. You won’t want to take my word for it but I assure you, it ain’t him.
If I had to guess, I’d say it was Owen Hargreaves.
What about Michael Dawson?
1. Is he English?
Yes
2. Is he currently married?
Yes
3. Has he played under at least 4 managers?
Yup, Paul Hart, Joe Kinnear, Harry and Capello
4. Has he had a transfer between 2 Premiership clubs?
Nope
5. Was he a Premier League player in January 2011?
Yes
6. Has he played with a group of French players at one club?
Yup, Spurs
7. Has he played with a striker who refused to move unless the pass went exactly where he wanted it?
Robbie Keane
8. Did he play for one manager for a considerable amount of time who was great before losing it?
Hart?
9. Has he played for a manager who lost the dressing room?
Paul Hart
10. Does he have a friend who plays for Liverpool?
Probably
11. Might he think Harry Redknapp is the Messiah?
He might…
12. Has he appeared as a pundit? (TSF probably doesn’t do so)
Don’t think so
13. Did he have a long term girlfriend as a younger player?
Yes
14. Had/has a strong father figure.
I’m sure
15. Not an Arsenal or Man City player.
Indeed not
16. Did he play a match at some point towards the end of March or first few days of April 2011?
Yes
17. Not a keeper
He’s not
18. Has a daughter.
Not sure
19. He played with Paolo Di Canio
No
20. Someone who’s got a chat about ‘another season’ coming up -see revealing tweet post
Don’t know
21. He’s been involved in a last day relegation battle
With Forest
22. He’s played for a newly promoted Premier League club
No
23. Has been subject to a deadline day transfer
Yup, forest to spurs
24. Council estate?
Don’t think so
25. Friend who used to play in Russia
Not sure, don’t know his friends
The nope to number 4 rules him out
Has anyone considered Rohan Ricketts. Spoke well before the spurs / shamrock rovers game. Talked about the “journey” he had been on. Seems to fit the criteria above?
Gary O’Neil ticks a lots of the boxes…..
Joe Cole raises some similar points as the secret footballer regarding new signings intergrating at teams. http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2011/oct/14/joe-cole-lille-england
Re Shorey – don’t forget he now plays with Odemwingie who was also heavily racially abused in Russia.
Also, Sidwell was at Reading at the same time as Shorey and therefore has the Andre Bikey connection.
I know goalkeepers have been ruled out (I think a touch prematurely) – but I’m going for a punt on Shay Given. After reading this weekend’s column I just got a gut feeling that ‘Paolo’ could well be Faustino Asprilla. Given would fit most of the boxes – though it depends if you’ll forgive the fact that he is not English.
Lampard, nailed on.
1. Is he English? (No, but played in the EPL enough & with lots of English internationals).
2. Is he currently married? (Yes)
3. Has he played under at least 4 managers? (Definitely)
4. Has he had a transfer between 2 Premiership clubs? (Certainly)
5. Was he a Premier League player in January 2011? (Yes)
6. Has he played with a group of French players at one club? (Yes, at Tottenham)
7. Has he played with a striker who refused to move unless the pass went exactly where he wanted it? (Berbatov? Ronaldo? Vieri? Suker? But someone who made me laugh as fitting this stereotype, one Mark Viduka)
8. Did he play for one manager for a considerable amount of time who was great before losing it? (David O’Leary?! Glen Hoddle? Lippi? His view on Benitez?)
9. Has he played for a manager who lost the dressing room? (All of the above managers, plus Martin Jol or Juande Ramos?)
10. Does he have a friend who plays for Liverpool? (He played for them so maybe)
11. Might he think Harry Redknapp is the Messiah? (Or is he referring to Harry thinking Harry is the Messiah? He has played for Harry anyway)
12. Has he appeared as a pundit? (TSF probably doesn’t do so) (Not sure)
13. Did he have a long term girlfriend as a younger player? (Probably…?)
14. Had/has a strong father figure. (Not sure – had to say for most people))
15. Not an Arsenal or Man City player. (Check)
16. Did he play a match at some point towards the end of March or first few days of April 2011? (I think so)
17. Not a keeper. (Check)
18. Has a daughter. (No, but you could view his “My daughter won’t date a footballer” as a metaphorical statement?)
19. He played with Paolo Di Canio -removed by public demand
20. Someone who’s got a chat about ‘another season’ coming up -see revealing tweet post (Haven’t looked at this tweet)
21. He’s been involved in a last day relegation battle (With West Ham?)
22. He’s played for a newly promoted Premier League club (How newly is “newly”? Coventry?)
23. Has been subject to a deadline day transfer (transfer to Liverpool, loans to West Ham and Celtic)
24. TSF is Caucasian (Yes)
25. Has a good friend who is African and has played for a team in Russia (I couldn’t seem to find anyone he’s played with who meets this criteria – but it could be someone he met in “football circles”?)
Todays article very revealing. The only team to have lost to arsenal with adebayor scoring a single goal, then go on to get positive results against united and Chelsea, were spurs in 07-08 (in years that both makelele was at Chelsea and adebayor at arsenal). Also had new coach in gus poyet who may have had a bad playing record against arsenal. Secret footballer must be from that spurs squad
Its Zat Knight. Played in match when fulham beat chelsea 1 nil by snuffing out makelele and has moved on transfer deadline day from fulham to villa. He is still playing today and is english.
The references to race and Paolo DiCanio are red hearings as he does not actually state he is white or that he actually played with DiCanio.
Played for a newly promoted club in fulham and in a relgation fight in fulham.
Dont know much about his family life but rest of clues are not certain.
Was about to comment the same about Zat Knight. The description of the Makelele game is a big give away, because it was quite famous. Although its not impossible that someone else had used the same tactic previously, and it was picked up by Chris Coleman, but that happened to be the first time the press spotted it.
Also not sure it is a given that he’s white. The comments about racism on a multi-cultural estate could come from someone who was black or mixed race.
Zat Knight’s speech patterns are particularly revealing.Most weeks he starts off a sentence with ‘Yet’.Check out his comments when interviewed by press (e.g. Ashley Cole bodyguard, alleged use of drugs). He uses ‘Yet’, when most would use ‘But’. Not conclusive proof he’s TSF but tantalisingly indicative.
Sol Campbell? fits the bill with most points.. & on twitter he seems to follow players that he’s been associated in the past with?
25. Has a good friend who is African and has played for a team in Russia
I believe that given the publicity afforded to the Peter Odemwinge incidents last year, TSF would not have stated such a fact if it could so easily identify him as a West Brom player. The only other player that springs to mind would be Quincy Owusu-Abeyie who played for Spartak Moscow. This means TSF is one of the following:
– An Englishman who was at Arsenal between 2003-06
– A Birmingham City player during the 2008-09 season
– A player for either Portsmouth or Cardiff during the 2009-10 season
Of the Englishmen at Arsenal, Francis Jeffers emerges as a very strong candidate if you consider that the PFA nomination tweet could have referred to a hypothetical vote and the “Premier League Contract” could have referred to his signing for Motherwell in Feb 2011, it is not THE Premier League but the “Scottish” prefix could have been left out as a red herring.
He satisfies ALL other criteria bar playing for a newly promoted Premier League side. However, he was on trial at newly-promoted Blackpool at the start of the 2010/2011 campaign. I was at the Arsenal vs. Blackpool game on the 2nd weekend of that season and remember Blackpool missing a few sitters in the first half before being hammered 6-0.
-The French players during his time at Arsenal.
-The Di Canio reference fits given he joined Charlton the same summer Di Canio left and the Italian’s shadow no doubt still loomed large over the dressing room.
-The “great” manager who lost it could have been Howard Wilkinson who managed him at U21 level.
-With regard to losing the dressing room, Brian Laws was sacked mid-season after a poor run of results during Jeffers’ time at Sheffield Weds.
-He is Scouse, so the Merseyside connection is there.
-He has a daughter.
-Married.
-He is currently playing.
-Relegation dogfight with Everton in 1997-98.
-More than 4 managers.
-Transfer between 2 Prem clubs.
-Signed on loan for Rangers on deadline day in Jan 2005.
-Player who refused to move unless the pass was perfect: Reyes? Kanu? Bergkamp even? With the ammount of clubs Jeffers has been at, he is bound to have encountered such a player.
-Council Estate? Could have.
-Father figure? Could have.
-Pundit? Not one.
Franny Jeffers anyone?
BTW, not sure if this name has been deleted or I left it out! Either way, this was my evidence for Robbie Keane.
James Milner….?
Todays TSF article has me convinced that he’s none other than Jonathan Woodgate of Stoke, for the following reasons :
1) Reference to tackling Cesc Fabregas indicates he’s either a defender or midfielder. I wouldnt expect a keeper or striker to tackle Cesc Fabregas with much regularity!!
2) Refers to adapting to a new playing position. Woodgate has been playing at Right-back for the past few weeks, instead of his preferred centre-back.
3) Talks about his contract extension. Woodgate was signed to a one-year contract in the summer on a pay-per-game deal.
Also, some have referred to TSF being part of the 07-08 Spurs side. Woody was. Lemme know if you agree or disagree!!
Surely it’s Andy Johnson?
Lets go back to the Feb 19th article….I think TSF at one point played for Glenn Hoddle. This could be at club or international level and therefore would suggest someone who has played for Swindon, Chelsea, Spurs, Southampton, Wolves or an England international player. My guess is Spurs. The Harry Redknapp “Messiah” clue does not appear to have been understood properly in my opinion. It is not the case that TSF thinks Harry is the messiah, but he is refering to Glenn Hoddle! GH was called the messiah by Spurs fans on his return to WHL as manager.
So when TSF says “It turned out that, unlike Redknapp, he was not the Messiah” he is refering to GH. GH was considered to be great(by some!) before “losing it”…..remember Eileen Drewery? And he, if my memory serves me right, also still thought of himself as a player when he was a manager.
I reckon it could be Tommy Smith (now at QPR) – he has played for a number of clubs in the Premier League – Watford, Sunderland, Derby. He probably would have played with a Paulo (Wanchope) at Derby. He is married with kids, has a strong father figure (his Dad was involved at Watford) and from the article today (18/02/12) has definitely been at a club where there were financial troubles (Watford and Pompey). He was also bought up in Hemel (no idea as to whether it was a council estate or not).
Any chance of any updates on this site? Or suggestions of alternatives? There’s been plenty of clues recently…
Chris Powell? He plied his trade in the lower leagues, has been on loan, played with Di Canio (2003-4 Charlton), was transferred on deadline day, is from London, was a club captain, etc. I don’t buy the Caucasian thing – surely if your best mate was black you WOULD have an understanding of colour difference. The only downside is that he wasn’t playing in 2011…but he was managing.
Intelligent, articulate, and has great experience of the game.
Dean Whitehad possibly?
English
Married
Played under more than 4 managers
Went from Sunderland to Stoke
Sunderland have had some lesser known French players (Mocquet, Bassila, Le Tallec)
Played under Roy Keane, who totally lost the plot after being successful
Possible Keane and McCarthy lost the dressing room
Jordan Henderson could be a friend from Liverpool (together at SAFC)
Not AFC or MCFC
Played March/April 2011
Involved in a relegation battle (SAFC 2009)
Causican
Just throwing it out there. Doesn’t fit with all of the checklist and there are things I simply don’t know (if he has a daughter or not), but I think there’s a possibility.
After today’s column (April 1 2012) it must be someone with a left-ish political outlook who would know about the Berkeley Free Speech movement, a key element of the radicalisation in late 60s/early 70s USA student politics against Vietnam and for various social causes.
But am damned if that helps elaborate his identity beyond what is already there. I think the Neville brothers are pretty left-wing politically but Phil doesn’t seem to fit many of known clues
Craig Bellamy?
Is TSF definitely English?
Is there anything else that would rule him out?
Liam Ridgewell for me.
1. Is he English? YES
2. Is he currently married? NOT PRIVY TO PERSONAL DETAILS
3. Has he played under at least 4 managers? YES
4. Has he had a transfer between 2 Premiership clubs? YES
5. Was he a Premier League player in January 2011? YES
6. Has he played with a group of French players at one club? UNSURE ON THIS ONE
7. Has he played with a striker who refused to move unless the pass went exactly where he wanted it? AGAIN, UNSURE
8. Did he play for one manager for a considerable amount of time who was great before losing it? COULD WELL BE GRAHAM TAYLOR (MAY BE REFERRING TO PAST AS ENGLAND MANAGER)
9. Has he played for a manager who lost the dressing room?
10. Does he have a friend who plays for Liverpool?
11. Might he think Harry Redknapp is the Messiah? PLAYED UNDER HIM AS A TRAINEE
12. Has he appeared as a pundit? (TSF probably doesn’t do so) NOT AS FAR AS I CAN REMEMBER
13. Did he have a long term girlfriend as a younger player? UNSURE
14. Had/has a strong father figure. UNSURE
15. Not an Arsenal or Man City player. YES
16. Did he play a match at some point towards the end of March or first few days of April 2011? UNSURE
17. Not a keeper. YES
18. Has a daughter. UNSURE
19. He played with Paolo Di Canio -removed by public demand
20. Someone who’s got a chat about ‘another season’ coming up -see revealing tweet post
21. He’s been involved in a last day relegation battle- YES
22. He’s played for a newly promoted Premier League club- YES
23. Has been subject to a deadline day transfer- YES
24. TSF is Caucasian- YES
25. Has a good friend who is African and has played for a team in Russia- QUINCY OWUSU-ABEYIE
Furthermore, the Scandanavian who he forgot was Scandanavian could well be Seb Larsson. Been in English football for over 10 years.
Danny Higginbotham?
Don’t know loads about him personally…
Why not David Bentley.
Checklist, every single one matches up.
1.-5. are clearly true, wikipedia will confirm.
6. He was a youngster at Arsenal during Wenger’s time, there were plenty of French players there then, and also a few strong english figures who would shout out, ‘English only, please’.
7. Yes, he briefly played with Berbatov at Spurs
8. He’s played for Wenger and Mark Hughes for a long time, Redknapp too I suppose.
9. Juande Ramos lost the dressing room
10,11,12 don’t see why not, he’s played for Redknapp many times
13. Some reports say his wife, others that they’re not yet married, but they’ve been engaged since he was 18, so quite reasonable he would consider his wife and call her that.
14. His dad was in the RAF, so seems reasonable.
15-18 all true.
19 not required, but I’d say he’s played with a fair few divers, also played with paolo vernazza, though I don’t think he’s foreign.
20. Well he’s still unsure about his Tottenham situation, on loan at various clubs, so no doubt he needs to talk.
21. Norwich 2004-2005
22. Again, Norwich 2004-2005
23. He went from Tottenham to West Ham on deadline day. There may have been others.
24. Check.
25 Quincy Owusu-Abeyie (were together for a while at Arsenal, played in russia for several years)? Obafemi Martins (both joined Birmingham City on loan around the same time, and Martins had just been playing for a russian club).
Other info on main clues: Bentley had gambling problems at one stage and was at Arsenal where there was a gambling culture. He’s not a defender. Several possible Scandinavian friends from time at Blackburn or time at Arsenal. In terms of players cheating on wives, well I think he was a youngster at the same time as Ashley Cole, Jermaine Pennant etc, and there are plenty of other candidates he could be talking about. The Liverpool connection isn’t really stated explicitly, but assuming it IS Liverpool, bentley may well know Bellamy, as they played together at Blackburn.
Could it be Danny Mills? Haven’t read through all the clues, so I might be wrong
Could it be Danny Mills by any chance?
So a few things from the latest extract – re-established that he is not a keeper as he enjoys the feeling of scoring goals, council estate cropped up again, plied his trade in lower leagues and had a successful break-through season. Quotes Proust but I think there are a few red-herrings thrown in by the ghost-writer and this could be one. Is now on the wane and no longer appears to be a premier league player. He was also in and around the England squad – some of his references (eg Trevor Sinclair) suggest around the 2002 and 2006 world cups.
I have a couple of curve balls – Kieron Dyer and Nicky Butt, however my hard money is on James Beattie. His LFC friend could be Charlie Adam from his time at the Gers for instance, plenty of Southampton connections: frenchies, redknapp, scandanavians, etc
BOBBY ZAMORA. He won Player of the Year twice running (in different divisions). In his article this morning, he gave himself away. Why?
Possibly Dave Kitson?
I think your check list is a problem. There is a book coming out, and unless it is only a few pages, the chances of there not being enough references to narrow it down one player is highly unlikely. No point being anon if its easy to uncover. Therefore, I would focus on the information that seems like it is heavily dependant on personal experience i.e. depression, financial worries etc.
I suspect that this whole concept is the idea of a shrink helping cure depression (declaration of wrongdoing for the sake of personal redemption via public good), I would focus on that as a starting point, the anecdotes are almost certainly going to be from a variety of sources. Potentially this is 3/4 footballers who jointly share the same concerns and mental health issues.
Dave Kitson…
Here is why…
An African player who is a good friend once played his football in Russia. When a group of us would go to lunch he would regale us with tales of skinheads waiting for him and the other black players outside the training ground, and having to run home while they chased him.
Played with Andre Bikey
He once successfully completed a transfer on deadline day
Kitson was announced as a Portsmouth player alongside Liam Lawrence on deadline deal
He has played for a newly promoted Premier League club
Reading
He had an ‘above average’ first season as a professional
Kitson scored 10 goals, finishing as the club’s second-top goalscorer
He has been dropped for a season opener
2005/06 season went on as a sub in the first game at home to Plymouth 76mins
He has been involved in a last day relegation battle
Reading went down on goal difference in the 2007-08 season Kitson played and scored as they beat Derby 4-0 but still could not stay up.
He played with a foreign player who was a master at winning free-kicks after minimal contact. His manager loved him and would say: “You all need to be more streetwise like Paolo,”
‘Paolo’ could be a rouge name as the player has admitted he uses these. The player could well have been Kanu at Portsmouth.
He played with a group of French players at one club
Portsmouth had a number of French speaking players in the 2010 season.
He played with “a striker who refused to move unless the pass went exactly where he wanted it”
Kanu again?
Rudyard Kipling is a hero of TSF
Kipling lived in Portsmouth and his work can be found in many areas still
Played for one manager for a long time who was seen as a great before ‘losing it’
Steve Coppell?
Some other checklist facts worth considering…(in quote form)
My empathy for Liverpool’s £35m striker comes from having suffered quite spectacularly in the wake of a big‑money move of my own.
Growing up in a small town…
In five years at one of my clubs…
A tax bill has all but wiped me out and everything that football bought me has been sold off
Much of what I have earned has been invested in funds with a predetermined maturity date, the first of which I won’t see for another five years. (is this contradicting the above?)
One club I played for made me their record transfer
I have won back-to-back player of the year awards
With five minutes to go of the last game of the season, I knew we were relegated … Not until I signed for my new club did that feeling begin to subside…But life must go on and, although I think about it every day, I did at least go on to play in the Premier League again
I played in a team that won promotion to the Premier League
not having to listen to Alan Hansen getting your name wrong on Match of the Day
Not too long ago I played for a club that got itself into a tight spot financially and the upshot was redundancies
It’s Dave Kitson
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dave_Kitson
ticks all the boxes & is probably in need of some extra income now!
Ta da!
http://ibenimages.com/2008/04/07/the-secret-life-of-footballer-by-david-bentley/
For me I think it’s David Kitson after the latest article. The Antonio Valencia story. Kitson was taken out by him in a match. He’s had knee problems. Was a failed signing etc meets alot of the criteria.
Dave Kitson has also spoken about depression and been in relegation battles. http://www.elitewelfaremanagement.com/dev/archives/227
Michael kightly of Jimmy Bullard both started in lower leagues I know Bullard was at West Ham at some point. I know kightly has spoken of depression recently whilst being injured
Woodgate didn’t grow up on a council estate, in fact his family were fairly wealthy and he grew up in the leafy suburbs of Nunthorpe a couple of miles from Middlesbrough.
Easy – Lee Hendriehttp://www.mirror.co.uk/news/lee-hendrie-reveals-suicide-attempts-830391
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejw2n5bv_lo
It is Dave Kitson, you’re welcome. :)
It’s Dave Kitson. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ejw2n5bv_lo
I’ve always been under the impression that it’s either arjan de zeuww or David Thomson!
I’m almost certain it’s an ex Wigan player from some of the columns and tweets!
Has it been considered that the player is completely fictional?! Surely someone who hates their job that much would just quit? Also a lot of the players listed e.g. Leighton Baines are speculation to transfers each window, this player makes not bones about the fact their not interested in playing, surely if this was the case you wouldn’t always be wanted by a club each window. Secondly, a lot of the storys within the articles are very cliched, and there seems to be a lot of anecdotes, that someone like myself could easily lay back with the view of coming across as a professional football player.
Just a thought…
Looks like it might be Dave Kitson:
Evidence that its Dave Kitson from some of the past Secret Footballer articles …
Started career in lower leagues – Cambridge
Been a member of a side promoted to the Premier League – Reading
He has played for a newly promoted Premier League club – Reading
Played last game of the season needing to win to avoid relegation – Reading
Has been relegated from Premier League – Reading
Has been a record transfer signing – Stoke bought him for record 5.5 million
That transfer did not work out – failed to score all season – played 18, 0 goals
Moved clubs on transfer deadline day – Stoke to Portsmouth
Career on the wane – was once tipped to play for England, now can’t get in Portsmouth team just relegated to League One
Friends with an African who once played in Russia – Andre Bikey at Reading
Once saw his manager pick up the chairman and throw him out the dressing room- could only be in the lower leagues surely – has to be John Beck at Cambridge
Has also talked about growing up on a council estate and from the articles has almost certainly played for teams in provincial 1 team towns – Reading, Portsmouth, Stoke
Plus this interview back in 2007
http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2…ng?INTCMP=SRCH
Has Lee Bowyer been considered? seems to tick a few boxes
Massively late to the party here (the price you pay for leaving the UK) but catching up with TSF blog entries has given me a few thoughts :
———-
Redknapp the Messiah
“Harry Redknapp is the Messiah” thing – until looking here I’d always interpreted it as a bit of a joke, TSF refers to Redknapp potentially walking on water at the start of the piece. Might even be a subtle dig from someone who doesn’t like ‘Arry.
“Everything is going so well for Harry Redknapp right now that he must feel like he could walk on water.”
Puts options like David Bentley back on the table, don’t think anyone should put any stock in it.
———-
Position
Not only an outfield player, but strong indications of a more attacking one – when describing being dropped for the season opener he writes about wishing that his replacement would screw up every header, pass and shot – no mention of tackling at all implies attacking mid or forward to me.
It’s not conclusive but it’s early in the TSF blog (so unlikely to be a red herring) and if tackling *had* been mentioned it wouldn’t exactly have looked out of place or given too much away.
“I spent the entire game hoping that the player borrowing my shirt overhit every pass, lost every header and ballooned every shot.”
References goalscoring
—> Potentially rules out : Shorey, Craddock and Konchesky
———-
Not a hardman
Talks about having a bit of a spat with the club “all-action hardman” – might be early in the career but to me implies it’s not a hardman himself. That said, talks plenty about giving and taking fouls.
“One relationship in particular initially gave our manager much cause for concern. It revolved around two of the team’s best players, namely the side’s much hyped all-action hardman, and me.”
—> Potentially rules out : Barton
———-
International football
Regularly discusses the exploits of friends in the national setup but apparently hasn’t gotten used to it if he’s ever played for the England team, given the first piece on internationals.
—> Further rules out : Crouch, Owen
—> Potentially rules out : Phil Neville, Andy Johnson, Scott Parker
———-
Personality & career
Apparently with a few years under his belt at one club in his peak period – mention of a legendary manager asking his advice (and it ruining the legend somewhat) implies being at the club with said man for a while too.
“I was young back then, but as you get older, and become a more senior member of the squad, things start to change. A manager may ask your opinion from time to time and, since assuming this position, I’ve found it a challenge to tell the manager what I really think and not just what I think.
The first time this happened I had been playing for the manager in question for a long time. He had always been a man who had all the answers and knew what was best, a man who I looked up to as a god of the game from the way he handled the players, the fans and the media. But now he was asking me the questions and it didn’t feel right.”
—> Potentially rules out : Andy Johnson (too well travelled)
—> Bonus points : Kevin Nolan, Kevin Davies (both under Big Sam for a while)
———
Ex-captain
In his piece on captains, TSF points out that he’s been a captain at professional level but no longer.
—> Potentially rules out : Kevin Nolan, Kevin Davies
———
Relegation and Promotion
Has experienced both, promotion to the EPL potentially whilst on loan (unclear from what I’ve read so far).
Dave kitson
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dave_Kitson
Wasn’t playing Premier League football in 2011.
Harry the messiah, no. Wenger yes.
Also check out the new Guardian film of the secret footballer. If it really is him, the height (relatively short), physique (small build), slight hunch and playing style (good control but very straight legged) all fit perfectly and at the same time discount a lot of players. Typical winger style.
For me, definitely Bentley. Also known to have suffered from depression.
The Secret Footballer is…….. David Bentley!
1. TSF is English – check
2. TSF is Caucasian – check
3. TSF is married – Kimberley Wells
4. TEF has a daughter – Devon Bow
5. Has played for at least 4 managers – Arsene Wenger, Nigel Worthington, Mark Hughes, Juande
Ramos, Harry Redknapp, Alex McLeish and Sam Allardyce
6. TSF has transferred between two Premiership Clubs – Arsenal to Blackburn and Blackburn to
Tottenham
7. TSF was club record buy – Tottenham £15m+
8. TSF was a big flop following his record transfer – David take a bow
9. TSF has played club football with group of French players – Arsenal
10. Played for a ‘Legendary Manager’ and ‘God of the game’ who subsequently lost it – Arsene
Wenger
11. TSF has been involved in an unsuccessful last day relegation battle – Birmingham City 2011
12. TSF subject to deadline day transfer – to West Ham 31st August 2011
13. TSF thinks most successful captain of his club during his tenure was arrogant and self serving –
Thierry Henry??
14. TSF has himself been a captain – England under 18’s
15. TSF played with a striker who refused to move unless the ball went exactly where he wanted it –
Thierry Henry/Robin Van Persie?
16. TSF was at a club where a brawl with bitter rivals which included the dugout is still a touchy
subject? – Battle of Old Trafford/Pizzagate
17. TSF developed his game at a lower league club – Norwich
18. TSF grew up in a small town – Peterborough
For info the Guardian ran a piece on Bentley in 2008 called ‘The secret life of a footballer’.
I wonder who the ‘devilishly handsome’ ex footballer who had intimate relations in a Dubai pool with a famous in her own right footballer’s wife is?
Doesnt neccesserily mean he voted for them, just means they would have been his choices. Pretty sure players aren’t allowed to say who they voted for ?
Joe Cole
1. Is he English? Yes
2. Is he currently married? Yes
3. Has he played under at least 4 managers? Yes
4. Has he had a transfer between 2 Premiership clubs? West Ham/Chelsea, Chelsea/Liverpool
5. Was he a Premier League player in January 2011? Technically…
6. Has he played with a group of French players at one club? Chelsea
7. Has he played with a striker who refused to move unless the pass went exactly where he wanted it? Hasselbaink
8. Did he play for one manager for a considerable amount of time who was great before losing it? Mourinho at the end. Well known that JT complained about him two days before the sack.
9. Has he played for a manager who lost the dressing room? See above.
10. Does he have a friend who plays for Liverpool? As a former player, probably the whole squad!
11. Might he think Harry Redknapp is the Messiah? Definitely
12. Has he appeared as a pundit? (TSF probably doesn’t do so) Not sure
13. Did he have a long term girlfriend as a younger player? Dated his current wife since 2002, married in 2007.
14. Had/has a strong father figure. Not sure about biological father but Redknapp for sure was a strong figure for him.
15. Not an Arsenal or Man City player. Yes
16. Did he play a match at some point towards the end of March or first few days of April 2011? Yes, but in Ligue 1
17. Not a keeper. Yes
18. Has a daughter. Yes
19. He played with Paolo Di Canio -removed by public demand Yes
20. Someone who’s got a chat about ‘another season’ coming up -see revealing tweet post Yes, he would have probably had a chat with Lille about possible staying on for another year.
21. He’s been involved in a last day relegation battle. Yes, w/ West Ham
22. He’s played for a newly promoted Premier League club. This is the sticking point.
23. Has been subject to a deadline day transfer. Yes, loan move to Lille was deadline day.
24. TSF is Caucasian. Yes
25. Has a good friend who is African and has played for a team in Russia. Could have been
I think most if not all the clues are wrong. TSF is probably very clever at covering his tracks – and it’s relatively easy to do – change a few choice facts, dates, invent a few unimportant events, relay third party experiences as his own etc. So, his Swedish friend might well be Norwegian, or Dutch. The African he played with who played in Russia might have played in Germany or Poland. Or might not be African. His contract might have expired before he moved, rather than being transferred. etc. Some of it might be true, but trying to sort out what is fact and what isn’t is impossible just from the writing.
So, with that in mind I think he’s probably Michael Owen. A few clues in the style of writing and the philosophy espoused rather than the “facts”. Check out his one and only entry on his blog http://www.michaelowen.com/blog.html – you’ll see a writing style I believe is similar to TSF. Look at the content – sounds like something TSF would say. Twitter feed the same. Reading the views and opinions of TSF makes it sound much more like MO to me.
Anyway, whoever it is, he has a serious chip on his shoulder. I’ve just read the book and listened to his R4 “interview” and I doubt I would like to spend any time in his company.
Could it be Matthew Etherington? started in the lower leagues with Peterborough, played for Spurs, played with Di Canio at West Ham and has documented gambling problems (link with depression?). Can’t vouch for him being articulate or well read though.
Matthew Etherington
Jermaine Pennant?
Relegated on the last day of the season (07/08) – Portsmouth/Birmingham?
Signed for a club he didn’t want to go to (Stoke) – is at Stoke
Was once on the fringe of the England squad – I’d say so
All 4 divisions – Notts County, Watford, Birmingam, Leeds, Arsenal, Liverpool, Stoke… not sure what league each was in at time he was playing for them but might fit the bill?
1. Is he English? – Yes
2. Is he currently married? – No idea
3. Has he played under at least 4 managers? – Yes
4. Has he had a transfer between 2 Premiership clubs? – Yes
5. Was he a Premier League player in January 2011? – Yes
6. Has he played with a group of French players at one club? – Arsenal
7. Has he played with a striker who refused to move unless the pass went exactly where he wanted it? – No idea
26. Has been diagnosed with depression – No idea
27. Played in the lower leagues at start of career – Started at Notts County
28. Played against Liverpool for a lower league club – No idea
29. Was one of the best players in a very successful team – No idea (Birmingham?)
30. Played for a club that got themselves in financial trouble – Real Zaragoza and also Portsmouth
31. Plays the Paul Scholes role – Nope.
32. Played under a captain who will go down as one of most successful in the club’s history, without having earned it – No idea
33. Played under a stand-in captain wearing a large tubi-grip with a marker pen-written ‘C’ as captain’s armband – No idea
34. Has played as captain – No idea, did he captain Birmingham/Leeds/Portsmouth?
35. Has played for a club who promoted their assistant manager to manager (and went on to get bad results) – no idea, Watford or Birmingham maybe?
36. Not a Liverpool fan – I’d say so
37. Played in a team that won promotion to the Premiership – not sure
38. Following on from clue 21: That team got relegated due to a goal going in at the other end of the country in the dying minutes of the final game of the season – no idea
39. Clue 38 was his last game for that club – no idea
40. His wage at the time of clues 38 and 39 was the best part of £100,000 per month – sounds right
41. He went on to play in the Premiership again after the relegation in clue 388. Did he play for one manager for a considerable amount of time who was great before losing it? – no idea
9. Has he played for a manager who lost the dressing room? – no idea
10. Does he have a friend who plays for Liverpool? – was at Liverpool
11. Might he think Harry Redknapp is the Messiah? – was at Portsmouth
12. Has he appeared as a pundit? (TSF probably doesn’t do so) – no idea
13. Did he have a long term girlfriend as a younger player? – no idea
14. Had/has a strong father figure. – no idea
15. Not an Arsenal or Man City player (at end of 2010-11 season). – yep
16. Did he play a match at some point towards the end of March or first few days of April 2011? – no idea
17. Not a keeper. – yep
18. Has a daughter. – no idea
21. He’s been involved in a last day relegation battle – no idea
22. He’s played for a newly promoted Premier League club – no idea
23. Has been subject to a deadline day transfer – probably?
24. TSF is Caucasian – I’m not sure his race is really identified in any of his posts?
25. Has a good friend who is African and has played for a team in Russia – no idea
26. Has been diagnosed with depression – no idea
Also;
Has a strong father figure – going by wikipedia; “His father Gary was a semi-professional footballer who inspired Pennant to play”
Was a club record buy for Birmingham
“Pennant was signed at the age of 15 by Arsenal from Notts County for £2 million,[4] a record fee for a trainee at the time”
(sorry for multiple posts!)
Matty Taylor?
Haven’t got time to look it up properly, but Portsmouth had many African/French speaking players, financial trouble, number 2 promoted to manager and Tony Adams could be the manager who still wanted to be a player? He started off at Luton or something I think. Also he’s always talking about redknapp who he’d have a on/off relationship with.
Being against the hardman in the team could be Kevin Davies.
Thoughts?
Its definatley dave kitson 3 low league clubs record signing for stoke 5.5m club into admin with portsmouth depression he has talked about huge talent never materialised
This weekend’s article has blown out of the water pretty much all of the suggested people…… he played abroad. How about Matt Derbyshire?
I have not read all TSF’s articles but picked up the book. For a long time I was convinced it was Danny Murphy. I am from Chester too and I got a strong feeling about the stuff talked about – newspaper the ‘Cheshire cheese’ and he mentions Crewe in the book.
BUT BUT BUT never played abroad! Drat.
That fact along side the council house upbringing the lower leagues experience and the top flight football plus the kind of money talked about are the main clues.
Don’t get caught up on the small details that’s where the misdirection is. Who has the motivation to write about the game like this?
Rory Delap. Paulo could be Wanchope
Still happy with Delap – had a room mate with a gambling problem (Matthew Etherington), didn’t buy a flat on the site of an old ground (The Dell) and was at a team in financial difficulty (Southampton).
Rory Delap ticks the following clues:
1 – he was born in England
2 – yes?
3 – yes – hes had been at 5 clubs and has had at least 7 managers
4 – yes – Derby to Southampton
5 – yes – he was at Stoke City
6 – yes – at least 5 French players/speakers at Southampton between 2003 and 2005
7 – possibly Wanchope, Baiano at Derby
8 – yes – Jim Smith at Derby
9 – yes – Stuart Gray at Southampton, Mick McCarthy at Sunderland
10 – yes – he played with Peter Crouch at Southampton, who then played for Liverpool
15 – correct – he was at Stoke City
16 – yes – 19th March v Newcastle, 2nd April v Chelsea and 9th April v Spurs
17 – correct – he is a midfielder or occasional full back
21 – yes – Southampton 2004/5 and Carlisle 1995/6
22 – yes – Stoke City 2008/9
23 – yes – Southampton to Sunderland Jan 31 2006
24 – yes
27 – yes – Carlisle United in League 1 and 2
28 –
29 – maybe – Carlisle were promoted in 1997
30 – yes – Southampton
31 – yes – is generally a midfielder
32 – maybe – Lundekvam at Southampton
34 – probably
35 – yes – Southampton and Sunderland
37 – yes – Stoke City 2007/8
38 – yes – Carlisle went down in 1996 – York and Peterborough stayed up
39 – yes – he left Carlisle and went to Derby
40 – n0, but he has also been relegated from the Premier League when his wages could easily have been around £100,000 per month. Do clues 21,38 snd 39 specifically refer to relegation from the Premier League?
41 – see Q40. He has played in Premier League again after being relegated from it.
The following clues are unknown or not ticked:
11, 12, 13, 14, 18, 19, 20, 25, 33 and 36.
Kieron Dyer?
Fits a lot of the clues and the video.
It’s Marlon Harewood.
Played abroad
Started in lower leagues
Made big money move to Villa – then sat on the bench
Been relegated
Had loans
good 1st season – won finnish league and cup
Always booed by Wigan fans after he gazumped them then scored against them for his new club.
Played with Di Canio.
Played for numerous “legendary” managers
Matt Derbyshire he played at premier league standard played at olympicaos in the champions league
I think its Craig Bellamy
Craig Bellamy could be a strong possibility. Fits a lot of the clues: Transfer between EPL clubs, player of the year, transfer record, married childhood sweetheart, has a daughter and son, had public falling out with manager Graeme Souness at Newcastle who wanted to play him out of position, clashed with club captain Shearer. Also has a strong father figure who was manager of a local football team. Footballing abroad could be Celtic loan in 2005, and he was linked again with Celtic during 2011. TSF seems to talk with affection of Liverpool FC, and his favourite football ground is Anfield. Guess who Bellamy supports?
I say its Lee Bowyer – he was involved in a final day relegation in 2002-2003 Bolton Wanderers beat Middlesbrough as his West Ham side drew – http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/soccer/news/2003/05/11/england_sun/ – Quincy is the African player he knows who played in Russia and He played FA Cup game against Liverpool with Charlton in 1996
Who do you think the Dubai swimming Pool wife is meant to be? I mean it’s sort of meant to be obvious, but is it C or V
Its Shaun Derry.
in the ‘money’ chapter of the sf book he talks about how when a famous stadium was redeveloped and turned into luxury apartments most of ‘our players’ snapped them up. he goes on to say he’d just signed at the time so wasn’t able to buy. so assuming he’s talking about fellow Arsenal players who signed for the gunners in summer 2007?
Southampton’s ground “The Dell” was redeveloped into apartments in 2001. Rory Delap had just joined the club.
Its David Connolly
Lee Hendrie, played for a number of teams including Villa for years, was declared bankrupt and lost absolutely everything, had an England cap, attempted suicide twice
But all also surely applies to Wayne Bridge…
What about Steed Malbranque?
Anyone thought to TEDDY SHERINGHAM ? He had such a rich career to have lived all the things the clues give us, I think he definitely would get his name in the possible candidates. He played for Redknapp (the “Messiah”) in Portsmouth, he played with Becks (and his girlfriend was a famous singer), he retired in 2008 so even if it’s not verified it’s possible he went on a depression after 26 years as a football player.
However, I think he represents a serious option …
In his most recent interview he stated he did not know John Terry personally. This rules out any current or ex player and nearly all players to play for England since 2004…
Francis Jeffers. TSF say’s he was a new signing for a club when a famous ground was being redeveloped into luxury flats. This must have been Highbury Stadium and it stands to reason that the Arsenal players would have been offered first dibs to buy flats off plan. He was only one of a few English signings to the club at that time. He moved to Arsenal in 2001 – about the time the plans to redevelop that stadium would be being offered to players. He is also from Liverpool area. Didn’t fulfil his potential. Has a daughter. Married childhood sweetheart. etc.
Francis Jeffers. Ticks every single box.
A good shout, except that TSF has now admitted that he has not played abroad, and Jeffers has.
Matt Jansen? Reading the article on BBC he seems worth a look.
Has anyone thought about Alan Smith? Played top level football with Leeds United (champions league) Man United (champions league), Newcastle and still currently playing for MK Dons??!!!
Please don’t remove my comment this time. Its Alan Smith he’s played champions league football over the years with Man United and Leeds United (hence the football tops he found in his drawer) and has played top flight football with Newcastle (but would of liked to played longer at the top as mentioned in the book too) and is now at MK DONS (which surely doesn’t pay as much as he was used too) hence the selling off of valuable items to get rid of debt.
One to consider, although by no means nailed on, is Nigel Quashie. He is both ‘English’ and ‘Scottish’, which resolves some of the apparent contradictions, about the right age and ticks most boxes.
Matt Jansen!
This guy started in lower leagues
Got in the England squad
Knows Ivan Campo and Hierro.
IT is wayne bridge !
its obviously Stan Collymore!!
Its not a football player. Its a huge media stunt. The guy is pretty bankerout, so if he get he’s name at the book, he could make lot of money..
Could it be Kevin Kilbane?
Jimmy Bullard…..the reason being my good old garden gates Furgo and Jack say so….
The easiest comments to trace are the most factual ones.
1. Played at a top club which moved to a new stadium.
2. Involved in relegation Battle with Coventry on last day. (And Norwich n city)
3. Manager who lost it, Keegan at city, OLeary at Leeds ?
4. England b cap
5. Is now Academy coach at Norwich, something he talks about aspiring too.
6. Played for A club that became financially challenged at Leeds.
Kitson ticks so many boxes, but doesn’t tick the new stadium box.
Kieron Dyer.
There are quite a few reasons why I believe Kieron Dyer. The main 1 being a slip up in the book. It refers to a bust up with an unnamed manager. However in the index names Ruud Gullit as the manager in question. This would therefore limit it to Chelsea and Newcastle. After looking into the teams Kieron Dyer fits the bill. Craig Bellamy is 1 of his best friends. He has battled depression. Was a party animal but now lives in a secluded country house down south. His image rights company took a massive financial loss as he describes in the book.
it’s david nugent.
Sorry but this is all nonsense. How is it possible that his name has never been inadvertently mentioned or even deliberately and maliciously leaked by somebody with a grudge – of which there must be plenty judging by the things he has been involved in, never mind a rival or tabloid newspaper?
Apart from that, with all the myriad clues that have been given in the articles, some of them seemingly contradictory, surely somebody should have been able to select the one player from merely a possible few dozen that fits the facts – particularly as there has also been a video supposedly featuring the actual person from the waist down.
The player has apparently been involved in or seen an almost incredible number of incidents and has so many friends at so many different clubs that tell him things, that I wonder how he has ever had the time to train.
Come on, they couldn’t even keep Ryan Giggs’s name secret with a super-injunction gagging the mention of it, how would it be possible to maintain this guy’s anonymity?
Good game, but this is pure fiction.
Cheers
Andy
It is David James. It doesn’t say anywhere he is white. The cover doesn’t have to be him. He done media work. Was involved with the England squad. He won back to back player of the year awards with Portsmouth. Started at a lower league team at that time. Was Aston villas record signing at the time. He does media work often. Also from his book he says in the late 80s, that he didn’t go down the wrong path as other youngsters. Meaning the person was born about 1970ish. David James was born 1970. He also played with a Paolo di canio, at West Ham. Left out the england squad by Capello 1999 and in 2010.. The drink driving didn’t need to of got found out by the media. I could go on but I think I’ve proved it’s him enough.
Its David James.
Left out the England squad by Capello 2010. 2 player of the year awards at Portsmouth in a row. Done and does media work. Done a paper article in 2010 about depression, with the guardian(Secret footballers paper). Big money transfer to Aston villa. Played for West Ham the 00-01 season. (The relegation battle happened). Writes for the observer newspaper(is a writer). Does media work, currently with BtSport. Says in the first book. Come the late 80s, I didn’t get into the other things, that can turn a young footballers head. Means he would have to of been born about 1970(the year David James was born). The Guardian newspapers video of the secret footballer being interviewed in august 2012. Skin Coloured Legs. I could go on. But all the other stuff, that matches up. Is currently out of my head the now.
Proof? Only the bits you think fit, and ignore the rest that don’t.
It is fiction. It is a journalist.
Yeah I was thinking that as well. Haven’t checked the criteria but he’s pretty vocal about this on his twitter. Would he debate the same issues as the secret footballer? That would be pretty risky.
maybe joe cole, he didn’t play in a young club… but he speak like if play in MUC
The answer is in fact.. Mark Hudson
I’m reading the book at the moment and my current thinking is that it might be Don Hutchison…any thoughts?
Tim Sherwood also springs to mind.
Having read the latest article about going out on loan, I think it could be Matt Jackson. He was at Everton until 1996, but went on loan to QPR who drew 4-4 with Port Vale. Following that loan, he moved to Norwich…..
It’s Iain Dowie. What do I win?
Also was in Capellos 30 man squad before 2010 World Cup but did not make final cut. Not an official question but mentioned in last book.
No one gas said Curtis Davies who ticks a lot of the boxes
Its mark hudson pal
Got a feeling it could be Joey Barton
Kevin Philips?
I haven’t seen it posted elsewhere, but may just have missed it.
In the first book
p.104 he writes “Antonia Valencia once blocked a clearance of mine and I swear it was like being hit by a car. That’s what I remember thinking as several fans helped me out of the stand and back on to the pitch.
p.108 referring to John Terry he writes “from a free kick and, as it was taken, I kicked him as hard as I could across the back of his legs and he crumpled to the ground. He went off for treatment…he re-entered the pitch.
Valencia has made just over 200 apperances across his time at Wigan and Man Utd and surely has only put a handful of players into the stands? John Terry doesn’t leave the pitch in the majority of games either?
Alan Smith? Former Leeds, Man Utd and Newcastle.
Robbie savage . played under a former united player and been at a few clubs.
Anyone ever considered David Beckham? Sounds an awful lot like him towards the end, but a lot of things elsewhere in the book suggest it definitely wouldn’t be him. Just another suggestion, not saying its him.
Robbie Savage is mentioned by TSF a lot, showing it wouldn’t be him. Seems to have a lot of bad things to say about Savage though, so it could be a way of covering things up? Get the feeling TSF was at United at one stage in his career. Savage was as a youngster.
good shout
Has anyone thought that it might be Michael Brown? He has had transfers between Premier League clubs. Was a Manchester City player when relegated. Certainly can be described as a no nonsense player. Played for Fulham when they lost 5-1 away to Man Utd in the opening game of the 2006/07 season. Played for Portsmouth and also Leeds when they were having a lot of financial trouble. I certainly think he ticks a lot of boxes. There isn’t a lot on the internet about his personal life to check, which sort of fits with TSF.
Like every other guess he ticks a lot of boxes but there will be something that contradicts him.
This is very clever fiction. As Ryan Giggs found out it is impossible to keep your name secret, especially as this character must have made some enemies along the way, apart from other journalists who would love to expose him.
Im sure he is the guy.
Still think it is Kieran Dyer.
It’s mark hudson
Has anyone mentioned Jimmy Bullard? Seems to fit quite a lot of the checklist points.
i don’t know if this is any help, but in the second TSF book he says he went to the 2011 round of 16 game between Spurs and AC Milan in which spurs won 1-0 thanks to a peter crouch goal. this rules out crouch and any tottenham players at the time. also in the book he tells a story of a boat where he refers to 2 of his mates as ‘Jonesy’ and ‘Tel.’ TSF also mentioned a game he played against West Ham so he couldn’t be a west ham player. TSF says that he has used drugs in the past and he has 2 sons
what about David Nugent. Didn’t he get a few player of the year awards at Preston (played in lower leagues). Played under Redknapp. Earned big money. Misses the friendly and helpful folk from his old ‘smaller’ club. PNE are supposedly a friendly lot (ask David Beckham who spent time there on loan as a young man).
He’s had a few fall outs with managers in the past, but who hasn’t. Was probably in the 30k ish zone for earnings in the PL.
Kitson may be the favourite but he’s 6”3. It’s clear from his book that TSF is not a very tall man (like 6”3) and is ‘probably’ a forward or attacking midfield player.
TSF says he’s won silverware. Nugent has won the FA Cup at the time of the book (since won the Championship at Leicester)
Here’s a quote from him:
“Everything was going against me when I signed for Portsmouth and, when I fell out with the manager, it was the end.”
He also had a bit of a fall out at PNE (not a huge one) when he kept courting potenetial clubs to buy him (notably Everton). Although the club were happy to sell for the right price, they weren’t too happy with him losing focus towards the end of the season if memory serves me right.
TSF certainly seems to hsve links with the north (PNE, Bury, Burnley?).
Didn’t TSF mention being played out of position too?
”People have doubted me at Portsmouth because I haven’t scored enough goals, but I can say I never played there as a striker really. I think about 80 per cent of my games I was a right winger.”
http://www.leicestermercury.co.uk/M-PREMIER-league-Failure/story-22755519-detail/story.html
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/burnley/6152307/Burnleys-David-Nugent-hopes-a-return-to-his-northern-roots-can-spark-England-recall.html
Probs not him, just surprised he’s never been mentioned.
1. Is he English?- Yes
2. Is he currently married? – Probably, yes (has kids and the mum is on his twotter pic)
3. Has he played under at least 4 managers?-Yes
4. Has he had a transfer between 2 Premiership clubs? Yes (Pompey to Burnley)
5. Was he a Premier League player in January 2011? -No
6. Has he played with a group of French players at one club? -Yes (Pompey had 5 in the 1st team squad 2009)
7. Has he played with a striker who refused to move unless the pass went exactly where he wanted it?- Kanu? Crouch? Possible.
8. Did he play for one manager for a considerable amount of time who was great before losing it? – Yes. Owen Coyle (Burnley)
9. Has he played for a manager who lost the dressing room? – unsure
10. Does he have a friend who plays for Liverpool? – He’s a scouser and stauch Everton fan.
11. Might he think Harry Redknapp is the Messiah? – Probably not (they fell out…but I think TSF may have been being sarcastic about Redknapp)
12. Has he appeared as a pundit? (TSF probably doesn’t do so) – Not much (have seen him do it I think but very rare)
13. Did he have a long term girlfriend as a younger player? – Unsure
14. Had/has a strong father figure. – Yes http://www.fourfourtwo.com/features/david-nugent-talentspotter (see also for proof of scouse links))
15. Not an Arsenal or Man City player (at end of 2010-11 season). Yes
16. Did he play a match at some point towards the end of March or first few days of April 2011? -Yes (Pompey vs Reading 2 April)
17. Not a keeper. – Yes
18. Has a daughter. – Probably Yes (see his twitter feed re: can’t wait to get home and see his angels and then two girls’ names hashtagged)
19. He played with Paolo Di Canio -removed by public demand
20. Someone who’s got a chat about ‘another season’ coming up -see revealing tweet post -unsure
21. He’s been involved in a last day relegation battle – Yes (Bury 2001-2002)http://www.soccerpunter.com/soccer-statistics/England/League-One-2001-2002/team_info_overall/742_Bury_FC (seems they lost on the last day while Northampton won) Nugent had made a few appearnces for Bury that season as a young player.
22. He’s played for a newly promoted Premier League club – Yes (Burnley)
23. Has been subject to a deadline day transfer – Yes (loan only)http://www1.skysports.com/football/news/11661/5530723/clarets-swoop-for-nugent
24. TSF is Caucasian – Yes
25. Has a good friend who is African and has played for a team in Russia – Possible (Quincy Owusu Abeyie was at Pompey with him)
26. Has been diagnosed with depression – Not sure. Seems unlikely to be fair
27. Played in the lower leagues at start of career -Yes
28. Played against Liverpool for a lower league club – No
29. Was one of the best players in a very successful team – Maybe (Pompey FA Cup/PNE PL play off final)
30. Played for a club that got themselves in financial trouble – Yes (Bury and Pompey)
31. Plays the Paul Scholes role (Sometimes plays Scholes ‘old’ role of attacking midfield)
32. Played under a captain who will go down as one of most successful in the club’s history, without having earned it – Maybe (Sol Campbell?/ Chris Lucketti at PNE?)
33. Played under a stand-in captain wearing a large tubi-grip with a marker pen-written ‘C’ as captain’s armband -No idea
34. Has played as captain – No
35. Has played for a club who promoted their assistant manager to manager (and went on to get bad results) – Yes (Tony Adams Pompey)
36. Not a Liverpool fan -Yes (staunch Everton fan)
37. Played in a team that won promotion to the Premiership – No (close with PNE losing in P/off final to West Ham)
38. Following on from clue 21: That team got relegated due to a goal going in at the other end of the country in the dying minutes of the final game of the season – unsure (not PL relegation at Bury)
39. Clue 38 was his last game for that club -No
40. His wage at the time of clues 38 and 39 was the best part of £100,000 per month -No
41. He went on to play in the Premiership again after the relegation in clue 38 -Yes
Talking about Nigent above obviously lol.
Also, the book mentions that the player likes a flutter. Check his twitter feed. Just like TSF, not huge bets for a PL player, but he does seem to enjoy a flutter or two. However, seems a but’lad-ish’ to be the writer unless he ghost writes of course.
Might be a long shot and not sure if it has been mentioned but i was thinking Dean Windass as seems to tick a lot of the boxes and if i wasnt on my phone i would do the whole question things
Based on everything Neil said, I suspect that it’s Paul Gascoine. Profile seems to fit at least.
Michael Brown –
1
2
3
4
6- Spurs and Portsmouth
7 – Berbatov
9
12
15
17
21
24
27
28 – With Sheff united
29 – Possibly Sheff Utd when they had their good spells in the FA cup
30 – Portsmouth & Leeds
34
35 – At Man City when Phil Neal took charge
41
Yes, because he mentions how capello was considering giving him an england call-up.
D Nugent can be ruled out. Still playing, has played for England and did not start in non-league club.
Nickey Shorey, NO, he has played for Aston Villa (see 3rd book).
Anyone checked to see if it its Mark Hudson? That’s my guess
Jimmy Bullard fits some bits of it…
I thought Kevin Phillips too. He fits the relegation points on the checklist perfectly – relegated on the final day playing against Spurs with Birmingham City in 2011 after a goal was scored by Wolves in the final minutes at the opposite end of the country in Blackburn. It was his final game for the club but he then moved to Crystal Palace, whom he helped win promotion to the Prem again.
Has anyone ever considered that its not any 1 single footballer, instead it’s a journalist interviewing numerous actual footballers and writing under the pseudonym The Secret Footballer?
ROGER JOHNSON?
In his latest book he talks about being on the bench for Stoke v West Ham when Ricardo Fuller was red carded for slapping Andy Griffin after a Carlton Cole goal (2008).
Stoke’s subs that day were:
Steve Simonsen; Andrew Davies; Ibrahima Sonko; Liam Lawrence; Tom Soares; Michael Tonge; Vincent Pericard.
So one of them?
Nope, we already know it’s Dave Kitson. He was at Stoke at the time – he wasn’t playing that day but it’s perfectly plausible that he would’ve been sitting on, or near, the bench to watch the game.
Why not Kevin Kilbane Some giveaways in first book.
Is it Alan shearer?
Andy Impey I’m guessing at please
I’ve been looking into this for some time as I know many people have. New person I wondered about is ten former Fulham defender Brede Hangelland. He would have friends in many teams in the premier league but I’m not sure he dropped any lower than the Championship.
In the most recent book it states that the player retired at the end of the last season so I am assuming that is the 2016/17 season and seems to suggest he was playing at league one level?
I was certain for years it was Scott Parker but nope! I think I’ve just talked myself out of Hangelland now but I’m still rersearching.
He had a trial at Watford aged 12. The thinking goes on!!!
Following on from the comment ‘Steve’ made on 13th Aug 2016 and having just read the Access all Areas book, I feel TSF is Richard Cresswell.
He fits the bill in a lot of other areas too (transferred between two Prem clubs, played at every level, never got an England call up, played for and was one of the best players for Sheff Utd when the Tevez goal at Old Trafford sent them down, played at a club in financial difficulty in the form of Leeds??)
Also, he retired at 36 and in his final season for York City he retired half way through the season. Cresswell was playing in the West Ham/Stoke game in 2008 where Carlton Cole scores followed by the Fuller/Griffin slap.
Cresswell grew up in Bridlington, and being from East Yorkshire, I know that it’s a working class area and isn’t filed with wealth; so the notion of him growing up on a council estate is very possible in Bridlington. I’ve been several times and know there are plenty.
All the above are reasons why I strongly believe TSF is Richard Cresswell.
Dennis Wise
Dixon Dublin
Andros townsend
It was/is..? Richard Cresswell.
Trust me, I should know.